October Movies Part 2: Forgotten Island, The Social Reckoning, The Love Hypothesis

I was on vacation for a few days so am trying to catch up on movies. Which is why I now present to you a real melange of reviews, ranging from gorgeous animation to biographical drama to steamy romcom. Let's get into it!

Forgotten Island: Written and directed by Joel Crawford and Januel Mercado, this is a very creative movie about two girls, Jo and Raissa (H.E.R. and Liza Soberano) in the Philippines who become best friends as children, grow into teenagers, and have one last adventure on the mythical island of Nakali where legendary creatures roam. Along the way, there will be themes of female friendship, found family, and discovering your purpose. All set to very bright and anime-esque animation, in a very unique setting, as everything takes place exclusively in the Philippines and draws extensively from Filipino folklore and mythology. As such, this should feel really unique and specific, right? Unfortunately, no.

The voice cast includes almost any Filipino actor who has become famous in Hollywood, but then we've also got folks like Dave Franco and Jenny Slate playing some of the creatures on the island because I guess fantastical beasts don't need to have a particular ethnicity. The two main characters are being voiced by Filipino-American actors, which sadly means that they have American accents, and according to my Filipino colleague, pronounce all the Filipino words with American accents, which was rather grating. It is very annoying to me when Hollywood Americanizes language like this - if your setting is the Philippines, why do your characters sound like they're from California? Oddly, the first 15 minutes of this movie, when the girls first meet, befriend each other, and grow up under the loving eye of Jo's grandmother (voiced by my girl Dolly de Leon), who is the one who tells them all the stories about Nakali, are the best part, when this genuinely feels like something you've never seen before. But once we get to the island, it just becomes a generic children's animated film, complete with weirdly cutesy characters that only seem to be there to encourage plushie sales. This movie is certainly trying to have a soul, but sadly, I don't think it fully succeeds.

The Social Reckoning: Speaking of soulless films, Aaron Sorkin is back as the writer-director of this movie where he explores how Wall Street Journalist Jeff Horwitz (Jeremy Alan White) cultivated a source at Facebook named Frances Haugen (Mikey Madison) in 2019, who ultimately became a whistleblower and testified before the Senate in 2021 about all the harm Facebook was causing with its algorithm designed to promote inflammatory and harmful content. That storyline runs parallel to a January 2021 practice session where Mark Zuckerberg (Jeremy Strong) was meeting with his PR team to go over his responses for an upcoming Senate testimony about whether or not Facebook fact-checks political ads. If you discover something revelatory in this movie, it would mean you were living under a rock, because there's no new information here. We're treading old ground in terms of what a bane Facebook is to society and the many ways in which it has become a dangerous and immoral company that prizes profits over any other ethical obligation.

This movie is meant to be a serious drama, but to me it felt like an insane comedy because it is such a Sorkin film. The dialogue, the acting, the condescending tone and casual misogyny...it's all so terrible that it makes you laugh. White and Madison are great actors, but they have clearly been told to deliver the lines the way Sorkin intended and don't bother imbuing their characters with any nuance. Their scenes honestly feel like two Sorkin avatars talking at each other rather than the two real-life human beings they are meant to be portraying. Jeremy Strong therefore seems to be the only one doing any real acting here, but he is playing a man who is famously devoid of personality, so there isn't much he can do either. In a weird way, this movie feels like Facebook itself, with Aaron Sorkin as the demanding Zuckerberg who no one can say No to, while all the actors are Facebook employees, just showing up to collect a paycheck and turn a blind eye to the terrible work they are producing. So maybe that makes this film so Meta it's actually good? Wait no, it does not.

The Love Hypothesis: Based on the 2021 novel by Ali Hazelwood, writer Sarah Rothschild and director Claire Scanlon are here to offer us a diverting and sexy romance that follows all the usual tropes and gives us a happy ending (or two). Lili Reinhart and Tom Bateman star as Olive and Tom, a biology grad student and a surly postdoc at Stanford who have to pretend that they are dating for...reasons. We all know the fake dating trope, and so yes, you can expect them to initially hate this idea but go along with it for a noble cause, and then to reluctantly catch feelings and realize maybe the other person isn't quite so hateful after all.

This movie is thoroughly charming, the actors have solid chemistry, and the supporting cast are also very fun and lovely, with Rachel Marsh playing Olive's best friend, Ahn, and providing the all-important female friendship that is so crucial to ensuring our heroine is a well-rounded human being and not just a woman in need of a man. It's a tale as old as time, but it's clear that a woman directed it with a very female gaze, which makes it oh-so refreshing. I can think of no better way to spend an afternoon than to lightly lust after these two beautiful people and watch them fall in love. I'm not made of stone, people.

October Movies Part 1: Finding Emily, Practical Magic 2, The Testament of Ann Lee

Let's kick the month off with reviews of three exceedingly random movies. Sounds promising right?!

Finding Emily: Written by Rachel Hirons and directed by Alicia MacDonald, this is a cute little British romcom about what happens when a young man named Owen (Spike Fearn) meets a girl named Emily at a student union bar at the fictional Manchester City University, gets her number, tries to call her later, and discovers he didn't get her complete number. Distraught, he decides he's just going to look for women named Emily who go to the university, which is how he finds Emily Raine (Angourie Rice), an American student who is getting her psychology degree in the UK. She has been struggling to write her thesis about how love is a form of destructive madness, so it feels like Owen and his desperate quest to find his lady love has fallen right into her lap. She agrees to help him, so she can secretly study him and see how his life falls apart, thereby proving her hypothesis.

Obviously, hi-jinks ensue and the two of them devise increasingly creative ways to find the real Emily, some of which may violate data privacy laws and get Owen into a lot of trouble. No points for immediately knowing how this plot is going to go -- it is very predictable -- but like with any good romcom, the journey matters more than the destination. Both of the leads are very charming, and the movie is full of swoony British vibes. This is a cozy film that will appeal to Anglophiles and is ideal for a lazy weekend afternoon. Enjoy!

Practical Magic 2: I had never watched the 1998 film Practical Magic, despite being a huge Sandra Bullock fan. So, I watched that movie in preparation for this sequel and thought it was exceedingly weird but had its charms. Which is now exactly how I feel about the sequel. Bullock and Nicole Kidman (what a cast!) play Sally and Gillian Owens, two women who were raised by their aunts (Dianne Wiest and Stockard Channing) in a beautiful house in Massachusetts. Their aunts are witches, and they teach the girls how to wield their magical powers as well. But due to the doomed romance of an ancestor, the Owens women are cursed - they can never love a man. If they fall in love, that man will tragically die. In the first film, Sally falls in love, gets married, has two daughters, and then her husband dies, leading her to renounce her magic and deny her identity until circumstances force her to engage with magic again to save her sister. In this movie, the plot is almost exactly the same, except that she now has to engage with magic again to save her daughter.

I am not going to get into much more detail. If you like the first movie, you'll like this sequel, but otherwise move right along. These movies are just so tonally weird and strange, but at the end of the day, you've got Nicole Kidman and Sandra Bullock being fiercely feminist and extolling the virtues of sisterhood over everything else, even romantic relationships (though Lee Pace does show up to inject a little bit of romance into the proceedings, because, come on. You can't have Sandy B. in a movie and not let her be a little romantic!) This movie is all over the place, but 28 years later, at least the special effects are better, and it has its moments when you can't help but smile. Give it a chance and experience the magic!

The Testament of Ann Lee: This movie came out last year, but it has taken me this long to finally summon it on streaming and give it a go. Directed by Mona Fastvold who co-wrote the screenplay with Brady Corbet, I was hoping this would be a Brutalist-esque vibey epic about a real-life woman I had never heard about but would be thoroughly compelled by. While Amanda Seyfried cannot help but compel you with her enormous eyes and charisma, I found this movie to be a slog.

Seyfried plays the titular Ann Lee, a woman in 1730s Manchester who was persecuted in the UK for founding the Shaker movement and subsequently moved to America to preach and create a religious community. Of course, she was also persecuted there and deemed to be a witch, because that's how we always deal with charismatic women who command a following. The script really plods along, but this is also a musical for some odd reason, which means that I couldn't help but feel like we were getting a religious Mamma Mia every time Seyfried started singing. Perhaps if I was in a theater for two hours, I would allow myself to be swept along in this story and give myself over to the religious ecstasy, but this is emphatically not a movie that works on streaming unless you are very disciplined and forego all other distractions. Much like Ann Lee herself. Am I a heathen for preferring Practical Magic 2 to this critically acclaimed film? Yes. Just burn me at the stake.

September Binges: Legends and Tommy & Tuppence

As September winds down, do you find yourself curled up on the couch seeking tales of British crime? Well, I've got you covered with a true story and an Agatha Christie adaptation (of sorts). What more could you want!

Legends: Created by Neil Forsyth, this six-part miniseries tells the true story of how a small team of British customs employees (played by Tom Burke, Hayley Squires, Aml Ameen, and Jasmine Blackborrow) were tasked with bringing down a heroin smuggling ring that was plaguing Britain in 1990. Lacking any prior undercover experience, they applied for the job and under the command of Don Clarke (Steve Coogan), they are taught the basics of undercover work, given new identities, aka "legends," and set out on a very dangerous mission. These people are all seeking something different from their mundane jobs, but all for very different reasons, and what initially feels like a bit of a thrill starts to evolve into something far more dangerous. They might have bitten off more than they can chew, but our heroes are going to get the job done, right?

While the series is definitely a bit of a hagiography, it is still wildly tense and entertaining. All of the actors are doing wonderful work, and it's always great to see Steve Coogan in a dramatic role, playing a hard-bitten and world-weary man who still has that characteristic dark humor underlying it all. This is the perfect kind of thriller for a rainy afternoon, eminently bingeable and satisfying, and it tells a very unique and compelling story. Plus, it's just one miniseries, so you get sucked in for six hours and then never have to worry about Season 2. Isn't that the dream?

Tommy & Tuppence: I have been a massive Agatha Christie fan since childhood and the five books she wrote featuring the (eventually) married detectives of Tommy and Tuppence Beresford are very charming and fun. So creator Phoebe Eclair-Powell has decided to create a contemporary adaptation starring Josh Dylan and Antonia Thomas as the titular detectives. In this first season, they are presented as exes who decide to start a detective agency together after they spend the first two episodes solving a murder. It's a six-episode season, so you'll get two more mysteries that they need to solve, alongside their own personal will-they won't-they drama that arcs over the whole series.

Is this a very charming show? Yes. Does it have little to nothing to do with the original books? Also yes. Apart from the names of Tommy and Tuppence, everything is so updated for the modern era that I find it hard to understand why we even need to call this a Christie adaptation. Perhaps if I re-read the original books, I would spot lots of Easter eggs and could take delight in that, but otherwise, this is a perfectly frothy and serviceable mystery show with two engaging leads. There are a lot of romantic complications, so I do think I'll keep watching Season 2 to see how all of that gets resolved, but this is more of a "binge for distraction" show, not one that fully demands your attention. 

September Movies: Coyote vs. Acme, Best of the Best, Pressure

September has been a bit of a slow movie month in my household but we're starting to get caught up on things. Whether you're seeking a raucous comedy or WWII drama, let's dive in for some reviews.

Coyote vs. Acme: Written by Samy Burch and directed by Dave Green, this is a movie that is so specific that I found myself both thoroughly delighted by it and also wondering if mine was the last generation that could even understand this film. In the vein of Who Framed Roger Rabbit? this is a glorious Looney Tunes film where cartoon characters live alongside humans and Will Forte plays a jaded lawyer named Kevin, who has been hired by Wile E. Coyote to sue the Acme Corporation, because they keep selling him defective equipment for his various traps to catch the Road Runner. What follows is a very silly and engaging film about how there's a whole conspiracy over at Acme, and how maybe the Coyote does have a case after all.

The first half of this movie is just an ode to nostalgia where you get to watch the Coyote's many failed ventures and it feels like you're watching a dozen Road Runner cartoons on a loop. Then the action mostly shifts to the courtroom, which is a setting I am always fond of, but may not keep you as entertained. My favorite critique of this film came from a small child that was watching this in the theater next to me, who loudly exclaimed "I thought there would be more Coyote, but this is all Acme!" This movie may have cartoons, but I don't think I would ever take a kid to see it - this is solely a cartoon movie for grownups who grew up watching Looney Tunes and are going to burst out laughing at a throwaway joke about Speedy Gonzales. The animation is great, the script is engaging, and you'll feel like you're a little kid again.

Best of the Best: Written by Hasan Minhaj and Prashanth Venkataramanujam and directed by Lena Khan, this is a movie about two best friends, Maya and Anjali (Maitreyi Ramakrishnan and Priyanka Kedia), who join a Bollywood dance team at UCLA and have to navigate the competitive nature of the enterprise alongside their own personal baggage. There are a lot of jokes about the type of people who join a Bollywood dance club, including the one obligatory white boy who speaks Hindi and is more Indian than the Indians on the team, and when I saw the trailer, I immediately wanted to inject this movie directly into my veins. Unfortunately, the final product is aggressively mid.

The lead actors are great, but no amount of charisma can prop up this script that is fairly lackluster, and Ramakrishnan feels like she's just reprising her character from Never Have I Ever. There's a reason this movie is just on Netflix and not worth a theatrical release - you can stream it on a rainy afternoon, but you wouldn't want to venture out for it. The dance choreography is definitely spectacular and worth your eyeballs, but it feels like all the effort went into those sequences and everything else is just going through the motions. I may have enjoyed this more if it were a multi-episode series where we could get more twists and turns and character development, but as a movie, it failed to either entertain or engage me.

Pressure: After all those comedies, you know what you need? A tense World War II drama about the hours leading up to D-Day when the final decision about whether or not to deploy the troops came down to a meteorologist. Directed by Anthony Maras, who co-wrote the screenplay with David Haig, based on Haig's 2014 play of the same name, this is a true story about RAF Group Captain James Stagg (Andrew Scott), who was recommended by Churchill to General Eisenhower (Brendan Fraser) as the best man in the country to provide a weather forecast for the upcoming D-Day landing. Preparations have been underway for weeks, and the American meteorologists, headed by Colonel Irving Krick (Chris Messina) have no doubts that the weather will be sunny and perfect, based on historical weather patterns. But Stagg is not interested in history - he wants the data to accurate forecast the future, and as he gathers that data, he doesn't have good news to report to the Armed Forces, who just want him to say that they will have clear skies ahead.

These actors are all at the top of their game and who doesn't want to watch Scott and Fraser go head-to-head in a battle of wills? The Americans are loud and brash, but Stagg is a quiet and resolute Scot who will not allow anyone to sway him from his scientific rigor. Even though we all know what eventually happened and that D-Day was a success, this movie makes you forget all of that for 100 minutes as you sit there, anxiously awaiting the final result and whether our hero will be redeemed for sticking to his guns. The footage of D-Day is also incredibly moving, set to music by Volker Bertelmann, and as with any movie about this time in our history, it all makes you feel incredibly horrified that humankind keeps engaging in warfare at all. This is a well-made and compelling film, and though it went in and out of theaters too quickly, it is well worth a watch.

August Binges Part 2: The Audacity & Furious

I haven't just been watching movies this month, I've also been bingeing a variety of shows and have some more recommendations for you. Interested in finding a New York serial killer? Or mocking the tech bros in Silicon Valley? Read on!

The Audacity: This show is on AMC+ and unlike other streaming services, the studio execs do not seem to have told the show's creator, Jonathan Glatzer, that he needs to dumb things down for the audience or account for them not paying attention because they're "second screening." So let that be a warning to you - pay attention to this show, because there's going to be a throwaway line in Episode 5 that comes back in Episode 8, or a shot that heralds some very important moment with absolutely no dialogue, and you will need to pay attention.

Billy Magnussen stars as Duncan Park, a tech bro who is scrambling to get more people interested in his latest venture, Hypergnosis, a company that appears to have a lot of data and is not afraid to wield it. Sarah Goldberg plays his therapist, JoAnne, a woman who is fed up with her rich Palo Alto clientele but is not above using all of the information they divulge during their sessions to engage in a spot of insider trading, while her husband, Gary (Paul Adelstein), a fellow therapist who mostly ministers unto the children of Palo Alto, remains oblivious. 

This show is ALL plot - apart from the financial crimes, we've got Anushka (Meaghan Rath), an ethicist who seems to be realizing nothing she does is very ethical, while her husband, Martin (Simon Helberg) is obsessed with "raising" an AI model while ignoring his troubled teenage daughter; Lili (Lucy Punch), Duncan's dissatisfied wife, who is having a lot of drama with the school board; a lot of teenage drama with all the children who are having to cope with social media, getting into Stanford, and all manner of angsty conundrums; Rob Corddry as Tom, the Deputy Under Secretary of Veterans Affairs who just need some tech company to help him sort through some data to help veterans in need; and Zach Gallifinakis as Carl, an angel investor who might be the answer to everyone's problems, but might just cause more problems of his own.

I wasn't sure I was going to enjoy this show, but it gradually sucked me in, and by the end, I was thoroughly consumed by it. There's so much going on, and every episode keeps building until you can't quite imagine how this house of cards hasn't collapsed yet. It's fascinating and a wonderful takedown of these sanctimonious millionaires, so watch it if you want to mock the Zuckerbergs and Elons of the world. Lord knows we can't do anything else.

Furious: Created by Elizabeth Merriwether, this is a gripping and engaging show about a novice FBI agent and former NYPD homicide detective, Alice (Emmy Rossum) who finds herself investigating a string of murders that she suspects are all linked to the same person. Unusually, this serial killer is a woman, and as Alice starts to investigate, it becomes clear that the killer is a woman named Catherine Grace (Lola Petticrew) who has very good reasons to target the men that she has been killing all over New York City. Over the course of eight episodes, we are treated to a delicate game of cat-and-mouse, as well a deepening moral quandary about whether it's the killer or her victims who are truly the monsters.

This is a show that deals with extremely grim themes. Alice just got out of an abusive relationship with her ex, Marshall (Jake Lacy), who is an NYPD cop and is working on these homicides, so now Alice has to work with him (yes, he never got in trouble for domestic abuse because no one believed Alice. And he's a cop so...go figure). Thankfully, Alice does have her former NYPD partner, Danny (Scoot McNairy), by her side as the only cop who believes her and has got her back. Then we've got FBI Agent Nora Washington (Quincy Tyler Bernstine), a woman who has been investigating sex crimes and child abuse for years, which has understandably taken a toll and led her to become a jaded alcoholic. She might be my favorite character, because she has a wondrous range of facets to her character that get to shine over the course of the season.

Despite all the murder, abuse, pedophilia, and human trafficking, this is a shockingly funny show. The dialog is whip smart and unsurprisingly, all of these characters rely on making a lot of jokes to defuse the tension and horror of their day-to-day lives. No matter how dark each episode is, I often found myself chuckling through various parts of it. Of course, you will still have to watch some gory murders and watch a great deal of psychological suffering set to a tragic score, but I found this to be a thoroughly well-plotted and brilliantly acted treat. Every episode ends on a cliffhanger, which sucked when I was watching it week to week, but now you can just binge to your heart's content! And I can promise the finale is cathartic and perfect, with a wonderful resolution that will thoroughly satisfy you but also leave you ready for Season 2. Bring it on!

August Movies Part 5: The Magic Faraway Tree & Good Luck, Have Fun, Don't Die

August is nearly at an end, but did I cram in a few more movies to finish out the month? You know I did!

The Magic Faraway Tree: Let's get this out of the way first. This is expressly a movie for people who grew up reading Enid Blyton's Magic Faraway Tree series and have extreme nostalgia for it. Or for people who have very small children who believe in fairies and enchantment and would be captivated by this film. Otherwise, just move along, you're not going to remotely understand why I watched this film.

Directed by Ben Gregor with a screenplay adapted by Simon Farnaby, this is a very silly but charming movie that fully taps into the nostalgia of Blyton's novels but tries to drag them into our modern age. Andrew Garfield and Claire Foy play Tim and Polly, a couple that live in the city with three children (played by Delilah Bennett-Cardy, Phoenix Laroche, and Billie Gadsdon) but then uproot the family and move to a desolate barn in the countryside when Claire quits her job and Tim decides that what they need is "the simple life." As you can imagine, their modern children who are very used to having cellphone signal and Wi-Fi are horrified by this turn of events. That inability to access technology, however, is what is needed for these children to decide to amuse themselves by heading into the Enchanted Wood and go up the Magic Faraway Tree, where they will meet Silky (Nicola Coughlan), Moonface (Nonso Anozie), Saucepan Man (Dustin Demri-Burns), Dame Washalot (Jessica Gunning) and all the rest. 

No, I'm not having a stroke. Again, if you read these books, you'll know exactly what I'm talking about, but otherwise, just stop reading already! I have to say, none of the characters are exactly how I pictured them from the books, but the set-up of the Faraway Tree itself made me instantly flashback to being a little child who was delighted by the idea of sitting on a cushion and getting pulled up into its branches, then climbing a giant ladder to get to whatever magical land was at the top of the tree that day, and then coming back down by sliding down the Slippery-Slip that runs all the way down the inside of the tree. God, it was all so charming. 

The movie itself feels like a very British pantomime, and every actor seems to be dialing it up to a 100. Garfield is ridiculously lovely as the father figure though, and while he doesn't feature for much of the film, every time he's on screen, I couldn't help wishing this guy did more romcoms; I could watch him all day long.  Overall, did I think this movie was particularly good? No, it was entirely too cheesy for my liking. But did it absolutely unlock a primitive part of my brain that had been locked away since childhood. Hell yes.

Good Luck, Have Fun, Don't Die: Directed by Gore Verbinski and written by Matthew Robinson, this is one of those increasingly shocking things in our current filmmaking times: a thoroughly original movie not based on any existing IP. Instead, it is a gleeful and almost Matrix-y bit of science fiction that tackles the problem of AI and social media addiction. What more could you want?

The movie opens in an LA diner when a seemingly crazy man (Sam Rockwell) storms in, claims he is from the future, and needs to recruit a group of people from this diner to help him prevent the creation of an AI that destroys humanity in his future timeline. He is strapped to a bomb and will blow everyone up if they don't do as he says. Also, this is the 117th time he has delivered this speech to this group of people, because every previous attempt he made has failed; he has yet to find the right combination of people who could help him on this mission. It's very Edge of Tomorrow, and I was here for it.

The subsequent cast of characters that he recruits are a great group. You have two teachers, Mark and Janet (Michael Pena and Zazie Beetz), a grieving mother, Susan (Juno Temple), an Uber driver, Scott (Asim Chaudhry), and a woman who is literally allergic to technology, Ingrid (Haley Lu Richardson). As the movie progresses, we will flashback to understand how technology has specifically been ruining each of these peoples' lives, and what they will now be able to contribute to this insane mission to save the world.

I can't give away more plot because you have to let the whole wacky thing unfold for yourself, but it's brilliantly inventive and compelling. This is exactly the kind of scaremongering I want to see from Hollywood about how technology is going to destroy us all. The third act does go a bit off the rails with the AI plot, and you will start to wonder exactly how high the screenwriter was when he wrote this script, but it's still a thoroughly entertaining and engaging movie that will legitimately make you laugh out loud with its audaciousness. There was a major plot twist that I saw coming from a mile away because of the way that a certain scene was filmed, but it was still fun to see it unfold. I love a time travel movie and I hate AI, so inject this movie directly into my veins. 

August Movies Part 4: Midwinter Break, GOAT, The Super Mario Galaxy Movie, Anaconda

I recently flew to LA for a short trip, which means plenty of hours of in-flight entertainment. Which now means you’re about to read some short reviews of movies I watched on my trip because I never saw them in theaters. Which ones would I actually recommend? Read on, it’s a surprise!

Midwinter Break: Directed by Polly Findlay and written by Nick Payne and Bernard MacLaverty (who adapted it from his 2017 novel), this is a supremely vibey movie about an older couple, Stella and Gerry (Lesley Manville and Ciaran Hinds) who decide to go to Amsterdam for a short vacation. While they are there, we watch the accumulation of hurts between these two people who have silently been bearing slights for years (well, more like the wife has been silent while the husband has been oblivious) but have now reached a tipping point. 

We slowly unravel their backstory and the dramatic incident in Belfast during the Troubles which led them to uproot their lives and move to Scotland, but overall, there really isn't much plot in this film. It looks pretty and stars two powerhouse actors but as the end credits rolled, I was left with a feeling of, "That's it?!" I enjoyed seeing all the tourist attractions in Amsterdam as I had just been there last year, but other than that, I can't say I have much to recommend about this movie. Though I might be persuaded to get the book and see if there was a whole lot more plot in there.

GOAT: If plot is what you seek, then director Tyree Dillihay and writers Aaron Buchsbaum and Teddy Riley have you covered with this animated movie about a small goat named Will (voiced by Caleb McLaughlin) who aspires to play the highly competitive and physical game of Roarball. Unfortunately, everyone mocks his ambitions because only big animals play Roarball, including his idol, a black panther named Jett (Gabrielle Union). Through a series of (un)fortunate events, Will gets recruited to play for his hometown team, the Vineland Thorns, alongside his hero Jett, and a motley crew of other animals voiced by Aaron Pierrs, Nicola Coughlan, David Harbour, Nick Kroll, and Stephen Curry himself. 

The Thorns have been playing terribly and one of the big issues is that Jett doesn't trust her teammates, feeling like she needs to score all the points herself. So of course, this is a movie that's about delegation, trusting others, and learning to work together as a harmonious team. It's wildly inventive, beautiful to look at, and has a brisk pace that will keep you engaged from start to finish. Given the Knicks' recent championship win, I couldn't help but think of who all these characters would be if they were Knicks players, so that is another fun side quest as you watch this film. You're welcome.

The Super Mario Galaxy Movie: Love animation but looking for a nostalgia boost with existing IP? Mario's got you covered. Directed by Aaron Horvath and Michael Jelenic and written by Matthew Fogel, if you loved The Super Mario Bros. Movie, you can rest assured you'll enjoy this one too. You'll get a rollicking adventure across the galaxy as Mario, Luigi, Toad, Yoshi, and Peach (voiced by Chris Pratt, Charlie Day, Keegan-Michael Key, Donald Glover, and Anya Taylor-Joy) attempt to save Princess Rosalina (Brie Larson) from Bowser Jr. (Benny Safdie), who is just trying to save his dad (Jack Black). Along the way there will be plenty of audio and visual gags to remind you of the video games and scratch that primordial itch in your brain. 

The animation is colorful and stunning, the voice cast is spot on (Glen Powell shows up as a very Powell-esque character as well), the Lumas are cute as can be, and the story just rollicks along at a breakneck pace so you never get too bogged down in unnecessary details. It's fun and funny, and you already know if you're the target audience for it. So if you are, go forth!

Anaconda: Written by Kevin Getten and Tom Gormican, who also directed, the premise of this film is that a group of friends who love the 1997 movie Anaconda decide to remake it, despite not having a lot of money or filmmaking talent. The friends consist of Doug (Jack Black), Ronald (Paul Rudd), Claire (Thandiwe Newton), and Kenny (Steve Zahn) and when they get to Brazil, they enlist the help of Ana (Daniela Melchior) to take them on a boat down the river, and Carlos (Selton Mello), a snake handler who supplies a snake for their venture.

Of course, once they get into the jungle, it turns out there's an actual Anaconda on the loose that starts hunting them, and everything gets very meta. I cannot say I paid ANY attention to this movie. My friend, who is a fan of the original Anaconda, seemed to derive a great deal of enjoyment from it, but she had also never seen the trailer, which seemed to give away about 50% of the plot of this film. I guess all I can say is, if you love Anaconda and enjoy extremely silly comedies, this might be the movie for you. But unless you're in that very niche audience, give your eyes a rest. This movie is not worth it.