WB Entertainment: Space Jam vs. The Suicide Squad

This week I watched The Suicide Squad in theaters, and then Space Jam: A New Legacy on HBO Max. Both are Warner Brothers properties, but while one was excellent and a lot of fun, the other was a hilariously terrible farce of a film that highlighted the trouble of WB being a giant media conglomerate. You probably already know which is which, but let me break it down for you.

The Suicide Squad: This is the most non-DC DC Comics movie ever. Which is a great thing as I generally cannot stand DC movies. Written and directed by James Gunn, this movie has absolute Guardians of the Galaxy Marvel energy, which was obvious from the opening scene, set to Johnny Cash singing the Folsom Prison Blues. 

I never watched the first Suicide Squad, so don't expect any in-depth insight here. Instead, all I can tell you is that this film is not dark and dour, but light and frothy, despite the fact that, as the title suggests, a shit ton of people are going to die throughout. In fact, it is rather startling how many people die even before the film's opening credits. It's quite the accomplishment. Also, this is a movie starring Idris Elba, so how bad could it get, you know? On top of that, we've got Margot Robbie reprising her role as the deranged but oddly lovable Harley Quinn, John Cena as Peacemaker, a sort of Captain America-esque figure who is very problematic as befits this squad of misfits, Daniela Melchior as Ratcatcher 2 (she is good with rats), Joel Kinnaman as the earnest Corporal Flag, and then...a giant shark named Nanaue. Who was apparently voiced by Sylvester Stallone, which I didn't realize until I just wrote that sentence. Listen, don't ask any questions. It's a comic book movie and you need to just accept that there's gonna be an anthropomorphic shark running around and having adventures. 

This movie is visually striking and incredibly colorful - there's a gorgeous fight sequence with Harley Quinn that echoes Birds of Prey, and the final battle with the big bad does cause a lot of wanton destruction, but everything is so pretty as it's happening. There are jokes galore, something that is ordinarily sorely lacking in DC movies, and this film blessedly does not take itself too seriously. It is on a mission to provide solid entertainment for two hours and it thoroughly delivers. I will never watch the first Suicide Squad, but if James Gunn keeps cranking out sequels to this film, I'll certainly be on board. 

Space Jam: A New Legacy: Much like I never watched the first Suicide Squad, I have also never watched the original Space Jam. I vaguely knew the gist, i.e. Michael Jordan ends up playing basketball with a bunch of Looney Tunes cartoons, but I went into this film with fairly non-existent expectations. Yet it still managed to be exceptionally terrible. In fact, it's so terrible, that it's actually kind of amazing and I wasn't mad about watching it at all. So...success?

In this update, LeBron James is our new basketball hero, and hoo boy. I know that the man is a phenomenal athlete and we must all love him, but I don't think I needed this film to keep hyping him up this much. Is he really the world's "greatest athlete"? I know a lady named Simone Biles who might beg to differ. But while this movie is ostensibly about celebrating LeBron (who, as an actor, is...fine, but he should stick to his day job), let's be clear who the real star is here. Warner Brothers.

This film is gonna take you on a rollercoaster tour of the WB Cinematic Universe. There isn't much plot (summary: LeBron needs to win a basketball game with a motley crew of Looney Tunes characters as his teammates to defeat an evil computer algorithm, played by Don Cheadle, who is clearly just doing this for the paycheck), but by the end of it, you will have gotten a two-hour commercial of HBO Max's entire TV and movie catalog. There are constant references to Harry Potter, Game of Thrones, and DC superheroes, with a whole montage that echoes the beginning of WW84. Even classic movies show up - there was a whole Casablanca riff! During the final basketball game, White Walkers and Pennywise were on the sidelines, and I just went, "sure." Then Porky Pig was in a rap battle and I went, "is it possible for pigs to be racist?" Also, there are so many references to The Matrix! I completely forgot WB owned The Matrix! It was weird!

This is a terrible movie that reminds you of what happens as media companies form giant conglomerates and keep merging until they own everything. It was so disconcerting to realize that WB owns practically every piece of pop culture that formed the bedrock of my childhood. As a piece of cinema, this movie is a failure. But as a commercial to persuade you to get a subscription to HBO Max, this movie is a very effective piece of marketing. Kudos to our evil media overlords.